Taking Back Your Power

I like Nippy aka Whitney Houston’s song I didn’t know my own strength. There are times we don’t know the power that’s within us. We doubt how strong we are.

Eleanor Roosevelt says a woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

I believe the struggles we face as individuals are not only there to shape us but for us to look back and say damn I never in my wildest dreams thought I’m this strong.

Abuse victims are usually advised not to give their abusers the satisfaction of being powerless and miserable.

I think it’s best to tell yourself that it happened not by choice and reclaim your power and not allow yourself to self- distract. It might not sound doable but when you careless about negative people and focus on bettering yourself and keep it in mind that you are not your circumstances.


I remember when I started in a new school after failing grade 11 the principal told me in point black that they don’t accept failures. The way she said it killed my confidence but me being me I looked her straight in the eye thinking I’m going to prove this woman wrong. I ain’t no failure and she doesn’t know what made me not to pass.

I went on to be on the school’s top ten achievers and I know for sure if i had put more effort i could have obtained distinctions (but I didn’t there was so much happening in my life).

What I’m trying to say is we are more powerful than we think. If we have set our minds to change our situations, we can.

 I have read a number of stories of people who have gone through izinto ezingathethekiyo but came out stronger and more powerful.

It is not over as long as you are still breathing!

Dysfunctional Marriages and Why People Choose to Stay

Intercollegiate Image

I was so shocked bantu beNkosi when I read comments on a blog I frequently visit about people who stay in dysfunctional marriages.

I think I have this fairy-tale image of what marriage is about and it appalls me to see people not living it out. The bible in my eyes made this holy matrimonial easy. Husbands love your wives and wives respect your husbands (Ephesians 5:33). I honestly or naively thought if people were practicing these verses in their households then they would live happily eve rafter. My reasoning was that women are affectionate beings, they want to be loved and men want to be respected and seen as superior or as the head of households. As longs as you respect him, he will love you forever or so I thought.

I never imagined people staying in loveless marriages and enduring all sorts of crap because they are keeping face or staying because of their children.

Divorce is not an option for me (Khethile khethile-You stick it out!) but hey! How do you stay in a marriage where your husband cheats and doesn't even make an effort to be discreet. I'm not saying cheating is okay as long as you don't get caught but imagine umntu that does as they please nje! And not hiding anything. Wazi nje that you are just waiting to be infected by diseases.

I know there are things I won't understand. They are not meant for me to comprehend hence I don't wreck my mind trying to understand them but what makes two people who vowed to stay together in sickness and in health.  I'm not refering to parasites with the aim of stealing one's riches. I'm talking about the ones that paid lobola (wadleka) and professed his undying love in front of his family and friends. What changes after a year or two? I know in the first two years they were probably still observing each other and compromising in most things and their different backgrounds can be a factor ezintweni ezinintsi. But why do people reach that level where they will just cause pain to each other instead of loving each other as they have promised to? Umntu enze unothanda as if they are still single.

Like I said maybe my love for happy endings is hindering me from seeing things the way they are. Or the believer in me refuses to believe that if people put God at the centre of their lives there would be dysfunctional marriages.

I know born-again Christians are among those who file for divorce as the heat in their marriages seems to be too hot for them to bear but I think the lost spark can be ignited and a couple that prays together can work through the toughest storm that want to ravage their lenyalo and be in a functional mtshato.

Disclaimer: These are just my thoughts. Don't burst my bubble phofu I don't even want to get married.I just love and respect that institution!

Living For None Factors

People these days have stopped living their lives for themselves. It's all about keeping up with the Jones.

It's quite rare to find a person that isn't influenced by their peers or what's trending on social networks. Life has reached that stage where people even lie by portraying a lavish life on social networks something that doesn't depict what is happening at home.

What happened to doing things that you enjoy. And not trying hard to fit in or impress people you hardly know.

I think we all want a meaningful life but how are we going to get it if we are chasing the wrong things nje.

Me being the observer, I see so much emptiness or rather vanity in people these days. Not trying to be biblical but inene obukuqala bazoba ngobukugqibela because we tend to start with things that should only mark our finishing line.

We are no longer in touch with our sense of being. Silahlekile.

When Things Go Wrong

When things go wrong is when we suddenly remember that there is someone who is responsible for us. It becomes clear to us that we have a father in heaven that cares for us. We can offload every burden to him.

Whatever that unsettles us and makes our stay here on earth unbearable, we can rightfully say hey God, I can’t deal with abc and d. You know I need your help and you better turn up.

I know when we are at our lowest we become more humble and composed. You change the way you speak and act. You get your act together. You even respect the environment you find yourself in but not God!

It’s like we realise that Jesus should have a place in our busy lives. A permanent role that He should actively play but we are too proud to give Him the steering wheel of lives.

When we are met with situations beyond us we call on Him. Like a loving father He rescues us and protects our souls. He doesn’t ask why now. Sadly we only want him when things go wrong. Not when we are on top of our game.

We bluntly refuse to let go of our ungodly practises that He detests and hinder progress in our relationship with him. Unfortunately God cannot conform to our standards or limit himself and be less of a God to suit us.

He’s not sellable to the minds that think He wants to control us and doesn’t have a plan for our lives. He cannot change to fit in our programme. But when things go wroung…!

To be continued!

How Different Are You in These Social Media Times?

You will be forgiven if you think people that battle with sense of belonging are teenagers or elementary school children. These days people that should be seen as matured, passed all those silly stages and have discovered their true selves are rather immature.

We are in an era where social media plays a huge role in our lives. It contributes both positively and negatively in our daily activities. And can be blamed for making people detach from who they really are.

Everyone wants to be noticed and cheered. See me, see me is what they chant on social streets. People are fighting for ownership of the cool spots. They want to be seen as smartest, the most knowledgeable, the dopest, carefree and open minded beings.

Some shame suppress their thoughts on many things and go with the crowd. It’s like they waiting to be told, you too are important. You views can add value to the topic at hand. Make known what you are dying to utter but have been holding back because you fear being misjudged.

I think it is of our nature as human being to want to take leadership positions on everything and be seen as the one directing, telling everyone what to do or setting trends. The need to have the upper hand is great.

The foreseeable problem is losing one’s self trying to impress strangers. Wanting to keep up with abantu ongazange ubabone nasemdudwini wamasele.

Truth of the matter is that we all have something new to bring. When we stay true to ourselves we allow the world to witness the variety that we possess collectively. Imagine when artists stop being creative and copy foreign style of recording music. Basivimbe ubuncwane bomamela umculo ocwengileyo.

Money and popularity have a way of fooling people. Sadly some people succumb to the idea that only rich people deserve to be heard even when they don’t have anything better to say.

Endizama ukutsho, be your true self at all times. Fight to be who you kuba the world needs it. Not replicas but wena and you only.

Mazi enethole.

Too Ugly To Be Cherished

The world is kind to those who were created or mouldered fairly. Opportunities for them are endless. By the virtue of their good looks, they get treated better.

Appearance is everything for this generation. If by any chance you fall under this much disliked category: fat, dark and ugly then consider yourself the black sheep of our society.

It only gives preference to beautiful beings. They can have the ugliest of attitudes, low intelligence quotients and be insensitive to others. What matters is the ‘undisputable’ fact that they are beautiful.

Do not take into consideration the above highlighted qualities. The do not judge a book by its cover idiom is never applied when ‘beauties’ are concerned.

The outside appearance is the key to greatness bakithi. When you are pretty or handsome you are seen as a diamond. Boys want to have you, girls want to be your best friend. They don’t have to gain anything from you. The air that you breathe is sufficient enough for them until the next beautiful thing comes along.

What drops my jaw on the floor is how “ugly” people are treated. The insults they have to endure because they are not beautiful Nkosi yam! Anyone feels obliged to pass a bad remark on them. No one will come to their rescue.

Gabby Sidibe is a living example of such. Her success and proven talent doesn’t mean anything to merciless people who feel offended by the way God created her. People refuse to see the good in her. What she stands for and has to offer doesn’t count into her favour.

Sadly the beautiful Vogue worthy celebrities we see, have reconstructed themselves in order to be pretty and likeable. Obviously their ‘health’ was at risk and had to go for cosmetic surgery to fix their lives.

Black girls are bleaching their skins because Black is no longer beautiful. Lupita Nyongo is not beautiful enough for a Black girl.

Andazi what must happen for us to love one another and embrace each other’s differences. And see beyond the divides that the world keeps on introducing.

YOU CANNOT BE UGLY AND BROKE. CHOOSE A STRUGGLE- That’s what they say these days L

Stars Who Rocked Cornrows Back in The day

Thabiso

Thabiso Kevin Mokethi has rocked cornrows the longest. You wouldn’t be blamed to think he hates inkqayi or shaving his hair like other men. I started noticing him with cornrows on Thabang Thabong. Yeah that kiddies’ show, you and I watched. I think he has locks now on KaChing.


Loyiso Bala who liked trends (think the lip ring he had) wore cornrows
in the early two thousands. You could even see him on TKZee’s Fiasco video rocking them.

Donald

2011 isn’t really back in the day but it would be unfair not to include the shades and muscle revealing top
liking Donald Moatshe who used to wear them well.

Trevor Noah

 If truth be told no one rocked cornrows well like Trevor Noah though the twitpic, he tweeted late last year would disagree (what’s in a photo wethu). I used to run back home from school to catch his Run The Adventure show and of course his cute face.





 Stars That Rock Dread locks 

Lerato

Journalists or the “inky type” as Khaya Mkangisa calls us refuse to be called celebs but I’m here for you my people. Plus if the work you do mean you should be celebrated why not?! True Love magazine editor LeratoTshabalala has something good going there. And I love your gap woman! (Weird but true, I ain’t a gap hater so allow).


 Brickz mabrikhado indoda yaseZion in this case, has a good stylist. Though eyi-

Brickz

outie yaseKasi his hair is always clean (I don’t know where I’m going with this…). Lonto I don’t know why the keep on postponing the rape case.

Yvonne

Mama Yvonne Chaka Chaka, Judith Sepuma and Nambitha Mpulwana know how to maintain their locks, they are long, clean and always styled neatly. I love you my African queens, oopsie Yvonne Chaka Chaka is a princess. Maar let me upgrade you.

Y’all Still Wrecking Homes?

This isn’t a new subject but it affects our societies badly. Something needs to be done or said. If we keep quiet and do nothing about it, kids will grow up thinking it’s normal for a married man to have a side chick. 

With kids’ growing tendency of idolising celebrities who aren’t really role models but people who are still finding themselves and some losing themselves, it’s hard to just watch and not say a thing! They have seen how the SenzoMeyiwa and Kelly Khumalo drama unfolded and how Kelly shamelessly showed off her baby bump.

Marriage is a blessing from God and the institution needs to be respected. And we can only show respect by not being a side chick and meddling into things bigger than us. You might ask whyare we expected to respect something whilst the very same people who should be honouring and protecting it are the ones luring young innocent girls with expensive gifts. The answer is simple do not fall into the trap of joining losers in their misery. Love and respect yourself enough to shield your soul from unwanted baggages that will do you no good. We all know they won’t leave their spouses for you. Even if they do please don’t be the reason of a failed marriage. Yes things were probably going wrong long before you came into picture but distance yourself from such situations.

Let’s be the new breed that doesn’t rely on men for financial assistance. Let’s not find solace in destroying other people’s lives. Don’t be the person to “shakeup” people’s marriages. If they have problems and need a distraction the counsellors’ room should be the first step not you. I was so thrown back by my friend’s response to a discussion we had. He boldly confessed that he would openly cheat to his wife and she should be okay with it. I was even stunned by the way he said it and how he told us a story of his cheating grandfather and the pain he caused his grandmother. This is a university student better off a Christian. Ndamatsheka!

So many TV shows have been created, magazine articles written to make us aware of the dangers of getting involved with married person but nothing seem to reach our ears. We’ve of its consequences but no one dares to stop. Like sir Isaacs Newton says to every action there is a reaction. You will give an account to God for actions. Phalakahle.

When to Compensate

People generally struggle with compensation. Some overcompensate to make up for lost time or to fill a void. Others do not even bother with compensating for what needs to be compensated. Either way compensation needs to continue regardless of our understanding. There are some instances where I feel people are just abusing being reimbursed for example a family I know lost their bread winner after he was ‘mistakenly’ shot by a wealthy man. They decided to settle the matter out of court and agreed that the man must deposit a substantial amount of money to that family every month instead of going to jail for murder. The rumour was that it wasn’t his first time and he just pays people off. I faulted the unemployed family because your circumstances can’t force you to turn a blind eye like that. I know even the harshest sentencing won’t bring your loved one back but you can’t be taken advantage of. It is understandable for parents who wants to be paid (intlawulo) by a boy who impregnated their daughter out of wedlock. Culturally that reinforces respect and builds friendship between the two families in a clean slate. Child feels acknowledged. And children will grow up knowing they cannot do as they please with their bodies whilst they still depend on their parents. It served as your conscience and had to own up. It goes out without saying for road accident victims. They need to be refunded to pay for medical bills and the expense the accident might have cost. Same applies for those who got arrested wrongfully. Not only did they lost time to make money, be there for their families, they probably have emotionally scars that can’t be fixed but can only be compensated.

Precious Kofi A Stay at Home Mom

Precious with her son on her back

We came to know her as a vibrant, petite model, presenter,and actress from Cape Town that rocked Afro like no one’s business.
She exited the TV world gracefully by presenting and producing Precious Africa. A show where she travelled Africa and showed us the most historic places in our continent like Mali’s Timbuktu and the ancient churches in Ethiopia.

But lately I’ve been touched by her outlook on life and her positivity in general. She paused from the bussle and hustle that comes with the entertainment industry and got married and moved with her hubby to America where she stays with her in-laws. And has a one year old baby boy.

What intrigues me the most about her is her maturity and her grasp of what it truly means to ‘do you’. Some of her colleagues from the entertainment industry are probably drowning in debt trying to impress their peers but yena she lives a total different life.

 There are many lessons to be learnt from her. She had a promising career and once you’ve reached where she was, it is only expected of you to break new grounds and be the IT but she shunned it all or so I think. Ungathi she has found her purpose and true self.

 Facts About Precious

•  Bay of Plenty (Actress) 
•  Keeping it Real with Precious (Presenter)
•  Game show on SABC (Presenter)
•  EMS Music show with Wright Ngubeni (Presenter)

My Eastern Cape Experience

I have decided to honour my promise

and blog about my experience of spending four full years in the rural part of the Eastern Cape. And it’s only fitting to write it whilst I’m still on my December holiday in this beautiful land of my intimates. My stay wasn’t planned. I was supposed to study in East London but I had misplaced my report and understandably I couldn’t enrol at a city school on time so I ended up attending the village school. They accepted me with the agreement that my old school would reprint my report card. I’m not going to lie having an aunt that practises her teaching profession there smoothed the entire process. With all that sorted out I could be seen with my new uniform and forward self in the assembly with other kids but I wasn’t singing my lungs out like the rest of them. Back in my previous school in Cape Town, in Gugulethu to be precise, we didn’t sing like them. Later on I would learn it’s not only the singing that’s not alike but the education is a little inferior too. They had a small section in a corner of a classroom that was known as the library and good Samaritans would donate books every now and then. So one Friday afternoon we were called out to polish one mud-built classroom with mud mixed with cow dung (uRhida). Like expected I was lost. I didn’t know what to do with myself. So I just stood aside and watched tjo that was a huge mistake on my side as that draw the attention of one most feared teacher there. She rudely told me to go get fresh cow dung and help out. It’s then it dawned on me that my life has changed. Did I mention that they still practised corporal punishment and they’d assig boys to get a stick/cane in the nearby bushes? In Cape Town, teachers feared beating children because of a law that abolished such harsh punishment. It was often mocked as umthethokaMandela. Adapting at home wasn’t hard. My village is electrified and has running tap water so fetching water from the river was out of question. We occasionally collected wood from the forest. And I enjoyed doing so and I remember my first inyada was so big and I couldn’teven lift it higher than my shoulders and had to embarrassingly remove some wood to make it lighter. I remember my aunt asking meif I’ve stayed in a village before. Mdanstane where I spent some of my adolescent years isn’t a village. There is a book I later read and related with in High School called Comfort Herself. She was orphaned at an early stage in her life and had to stay at an orphanage and later with her grandparents at a different setting but she easily adapted. That was me but the difference is the fact that my father is still alive and I never stayed at an orphanage. Her resilience saw her surviving in new environments and that’s me.Thanks to my upbringing in the Eastern Cape, you can throw me in a deep end and I will learn quietly how to swim like a pro.

Satisfied with What You Have?

Is there a part where we humans say we have enough like I have everything I need and I'm fine with what's on my plate?

Seemingly we emulate the giraffe in so many ways, you have a lot going for you but still you are eying what's not yours.

Take the Guptas for example they have everything money affords but still they want to control everything. Can't we be grateful for the little or  big that we have.

Elokshin yazi nawe there is this unneeded competition of always wanting to outshine your neighbour at all cost and forgetting on focusing on the most important free things in life.

I for one I try not to be trapped on this rat race and the desire of wanting more and more. A number of people live beyond their means even the credit bureau shem has forgotten their debts.  

I know ‘DO YOU’ has become a cliché but I think it’s the only way out really.

To me it makes sense to compete with yourself and strive to outdo your previous achievement and not measure your accomplishments with others.

Someone on facebook said something so profound - "jealous is when you count someone's blessings instead of yours" and I couldn't  have said it better !!

So man, don't lose your purpose lana emhlabeni by living someone's life and helping them realise their dreams by constantly reminding them by forever showing up with what they want or striving for.

Do I make sense?!

I was contemplating whether to post this as a note on facebook or lana so ja... I wrote this four or five months ago.

To Tag or Not To Tag?

I do not want to sound like a Twitter cop because for someone like me with two followers my right to brag is non-existent. Excuse me for not moving on with the times, LOL!

 

I get really worked up when people who hold influential positions misuse them. It just gets to me. Even the ones who want to gain popularity by being 'bitchy'.

 

I don't know how one feels when they bring others down. We are not the same vele some are sensitive, others don't give a Tugela river! We just need to learn to respect each other qha ke!

 

I am as nosy as they come but getting my hands all muddy and dirty with people I claim to care about doesn't make sense. So when you tweet trash about someone why do you feel the need to tag them?

 

What are you hoping to achieve, we all fool around and have our preferences but why the need to shove it at people's face. Is it attention seeking or trying to be cool among your peers at someone's expense?!

 

I have read the two letters that were sent to Khaya Dlanga anonymously by women who were voicing out their frustrations after dumping their cheating boyfriends  . At the end of both letters I more was worried about the women who wrote them rather than the so called losers. The anger that we direct to some people is actually the window that gives people an idea about our bitterness.

 

I for one don't even have the guts to tag someone when I have said something good about them because I don't want them to think I'm buying their faces or looking for a retweet. That's just me and my pride.

 

Then there are those who try to water down the negativity that some folks have NYONYOBAD on Twitter by saying we shouldn't take anything that happens there seriously.  C’mon! Our Tweets are an indication of what's going on your head so please nantsika!

Hashtag SeeYourLife!

Face For What Vele?

It pains me that my sisters and brothers have decided to personify diseases and ungodly practices.

It’s okay to accept that an illness has made your body a host but don't make it yours. Ayinguwe tu kaloku!

It does not and shouldn't define who you are. Do not allow it to limit your abilities.

I was so proud when I saw a woman who has full blown aids wearing a sleeveless top and going about her day.

People tend to stigmatize certain diseases an act like only promiscuous people acquire them.

Andiyazi but we should move away from discriminating people based on what they have contracted. Umntu ngumntu  regardless of an opportunistic illness that made their body a victim.

For years I had asthma and needed to be oxygenated whenever the rainy season loomed. And it took a woman of God at Christian boarding school I attended to free me from 'my chronic illness.'

She asked if I had really accepted Christ if so then my family should testify by seeing Jesus the healer evident in my life.

Bear in mind when she said this, I couldn't breathe and needed my 'oxygen' desperately but her words haunted me and I took it to God in prayer.

Some believe, you can outgrow asthma but I believe it was the finished work of Calvary that healed me. It’s all about stretching your faith.

Doubtlessly I believe in awareness and taking the necessary precautions but we should not humanize diseases. And be okay with being called the face of ... And of ...

Don't brand yourself as the positive one. When you step into a room let's not see you as that woman living with HIV and Aids. You are more than that. You were created in the image and likeness of God. A virgin had to give birth for you to be here. Meaning the impossible had to be made possible for you and I.

Kwaye self-pity is never an option. Stay strong.

You must be wondering, why most of my titles have question marks nhe? Ingxaki I have questions than answers. That I cannot help!!!

Must I Go Nood To Be Heard?!

Maybe I am forever scarred by the brutality that french people shown to Sarah Baartman that I can't appreciate women who parade themselves for a good cause.

My question is do we need to strip naked to be heard? Perhaps I have missed the memo that said in order for women to be equal game players they need to go exotic.

We are people of great influence and every kid out there knows sex sells. If we conform to this, the next generation won't be spared in degrading themselves to secure their social standing.

Parading our bodies in this undignified manner makes us look like loose cannons. There are plenty of ways of retaliating against social ills.

It's good to think outside the box but we shouldn't be the ones perpetuating indecency.

I'm old fashioned. I know but I liked how women in the sixties picketed. They managed to get their voices heard without going all Delilah...

She Shall Be Called A Woman

Women are the most enduring beings ever.

Women can literally put up with anything.
Iyakwazi lanto ufukamela amaqanda abolileyo ngelokufihla ihlazo lomzi walo.

I am always thrown back when people judge women who stay in abusive relationships.

I believe most of them are waiting for that I have had enough moment. And when that moment finally present itself, you better pray you not close by to feel their wrath.

Sadly to some it never comes and they die in the hands of their loved ones.

I can't find it in my heart to forgive that Silvertown woman who allowed old men to do as they lusted in her underage daughter in exchange for a beer.

And the women that do nothing after they have heard how their spouses secretly molested their babies.

Its our duty as women to shield what we love and doubtlessly sacrifice our own happiness to see it blossom into something wonderful.

Having mentioned all this I still pride myself in being a woman in Africa. Though we are not there yet in terms of eradicating  women abuse, human tracking, poverty but I know with the strength that God has bestowed in us we can do it.

Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka our first female deputy president is a perfect example of how high we can spread our wings. She was recently appointed  as new UN Women Executive Director.

Is My Hair Too African?

 

Let me partake on this weave and natural hair debate that has never reached any conclusion.

It makes perfect sense for Africans to grow their natural hair.

I'm sure the Westerners are laughing at us now.

Have you seen a white woman putting on a dead black woman's hair? Or rocking a Pitch Black Afro wig?

My primary School teacher often said Ubuhle bentombi zinwele zayo so what happens when you are wearing synthetic or worse Brazilian weave.

Doesn't it bother you that fake hair is mostly sold in Brazil and India where poverty rates is escalating? They are likely encouraged to sell their human hair to make ends meet. Euww!

It's an undeniable fact that the minute you take if off the counter and pay few thousands it becomes yours? Right?!

I don't want to be too religious on you because its not my place but I think we are selling ourselves short.

To me, seeing a black sassy woman in a weave represents a lost generation.

We have detached from who we are and we subconsciously allowed the media to dictate to us what true beauty is.

You are not your hair but its part of who you are.

Love and appreciate the kinky hair you were born with.

Dancing With A White Guy

I just  liked this Pic

I do not see the fuss around schools having segregated matric balls.

One thing we should refrain from is forcing ourselves to Whites.

I was born in the late eighties and frankly I was privileged enough not to experience apartheid.

The only memories I have of this 'devious past' is that in my hood whenever my late mama shouted nantsi ihagu-the huge truck that was used by apartheid enforcers, I would subconsciously hide under the table.

Horrible things occurred between 1948 till 1993. Comrades disappeared, the amazing Black Conscience Leader Steve Bantu Biko was tortured by brutal prison warders and died in their custody. Chris Thembisile Hani was assassinated in 1993(I for one see foul play there remember it was during the Convention for a Democratic South Africa negotiations between Tamkhulu Nelson Rholihlahla Mandela, F. W. De Klerk and  others).

The Truth and Reconciliation Committee brought more sorrows than closure as families had to watch intense video clips of how their loved ones died in the mercy of abelungu and the sell outs blacks who for the benefits of their loved ones betrayed their people and inflicted pain.

Nothing and I repeat nothing can wipe away the image of Gugulethu 7 and the Sharpville massacre to name just a few.

Twenty years after apartheid and we still dancing to its tunes. Fori ntoni maan. Surely igazi labo zange liphalale nje.

I've read stories about certain Afrikaners who have created their own village in  Tshwane.

I want to proclaim Afrika for Africans but let's not be selfish and reintroduce apartheid slowly by chanting words that sow disintegration and hatred towards each other.

Those who are old say the National Party lead government made mixed race people believe they are better than Blacks and should work closer with them to attain their approval of being human & made black South Africans believe their are better than their fellow Africans.

How is all this related to the separate send-off for grade 12s. Simple dear, the big beautiful trees we see are kept together by their roots and it would be pointless to cut a tree from its stems and leaving the powerful roots.

If we sincerely want to curb racial segregation, my leaders should firstly try to root out racism and the belief certain races are superior than others.

We all breath the same air and we all excrete faeces and our blood colour is the
same, black or white we are all the same and if kids are not comfortable with one another forcing them to bond would create unnecessary resentment.

Meanwhile parents should try instilling good values on their kids because they reflect what is happening at home.

We tend to focus more on senseless things and not uncover the cancer that is slightly eating up ubuntu.

Anyway this is how I see it, it does not have to be correct. Feel free and tell me your thoughts 'comrade'

One Step At A Time/The Blessing

Ordinarily we expect parents to take care of the needs of their children and devote their time in making sure that they have everything they need but that is not the case with Masixole Gilana, at 23 life has hit him hard but through it all he stood his ground and persistent to make an honest living.

Masixole, originally from a small village few kilometres from Centane called Gqunqe joined hundreds of Eastern Capers in 2006 and headed to the Mother City.

The transition was not smooth and easy as he struggled to adjust to the fast paced city life.

Back in Gqunqe everyone knew who he was and didn't battle for his Aunt's business to be noticed as he often had to accompany his aunt who sold woven mats to pensioners.

He found himself immersed into this big city life but had to grow out of it quickly and find a way of making things work, "I enrolled at Mandela High School in Crossroads to do my grade ten and I was staying with my older sister  and brother so I decided to sell snacks to make ends meet and this continued throughout my high school years.

My teachers and classmates didn't expect me to pass because my attention was so divided, little did they know that I slept after 2 pm trying to catch up.

I truthfully enjoyed this, I had a timetable and I stuck by it.

I then worked as a cashier for Kentucky Fried Chicken for eleven months and when that period ended I applied to be a Stock Controller at Game Stores and I tirelessly worked there for five months but got bored and resigned. I was so used being my own boss.

I applied for a six month Business Management course at Cape Town College and in between classes and assignments I lived a double life as train vendor to support my studies and my basic needs.

                                                                                  Social Life
As busy as I am I still make time for friends and family. I love watching TV and going out with friends and I try to make time for them but I don't want to be like those guys at Ekasi that start their weekend on Thursdays and finish it off with a Phuza Monday.

Challeges & Hopes For His Business
I'm passionate about entrepreneurship and being my own boss though a small business has its own challeges. Like here there are many of us and I try to distinguish myself from the rest by selling fruit and snacks. So far I'm the only one doing that.

I'd make more money when I have a stand because being mobile means leaving some snacks though I don't want to sell andinayo.

Plans For The Future
I'm looking for a job because being a vendor now is challenging with Metro Rail chasing us and not wanting us to operate from their stations. Plus I'm not comfortable with the environment.

Masixole enrolled at the Cape Peninsula University of Technology to study National Diploma in Entrepreneurship and funds his education, something his colleagues would see as a setback and a sign to give up and join oomahlalela elokshini.

Let's change this world by being the best we can be and remember tough times do not last but tough people do.

I hope you are blessed by his story as I am so shiya owakho umzila.

Shopping Assistants

Total Jobs Pic

OMG! I don't know whether they are trained to lie and sell people whatever they seem to be interested in.

Following consumers around and telling them prices without even asking for them is their daily struggle. I mean I will yell or indicate when I need help.


Long back I visited a retail store that sells  expensive clothes. A woman who wears what looked like size 40 was fitting a tight dress that didn't flatter her love handles and she asked the assistant if the dress was okay on her, she didn't hesitate and told her its a right cut for her.

Me not wanting to sound rude and jealous I walked away in dismay...

I love the colour purple, biblically it has a meaning and I won't share it with you hardy. I needed a bag but a saw a pink one at a boutique close to where I work.

And I asked if they had the bag in purple, My Word, the assistant started telling me how everyone wanted that bag and and I must admit it was not the best they had and didn't see a reason to go on & on kuba ibingekho caba yabo but I wanted it lol.

I know the goods need to be off the shelves and the big bosses want to count profit at the end of the month qondile but forcing people to take home things they don't need is bad, horrible.

Like Oomatshonisa that keep on lending to people who clearly have a mounting debt.

Yhoo its so worse for people that get social grants as illegal as it is they have no choice but to leave their bank cards(obvious ne-pin alok) and I'd's with the lenders. Its business baba akudlalwa.

I strongly believe in black empowerment and liberating our minds but we too need to say kwanele!

Kwanele in everything the lying shop assistants,
Kwanele to corrupt leaders,
Kwanele to mediocre education,
Kwanele to being treated as second citizens kulomZantsi Afrika!

Ja I just wanted to vent, nothing more o less! Remember that KFC add I'm hungry and angry its all about ngry ngry!!!